Armin Lieks Turtles
by This Coffee Tastes Like Crap
Summary: "Say something," Eren whispered. "I like turtles" was his immediate response. Eren covered his face with his hand. "Mikasa's in her room getting dressed." Armin basically being an adorable little ball of fluff and ruthless vengeance. (ArminXChrista) and others (I think)
1. Nobody Lieks Cain

"Eren!"

Armin perked up from his book he was reading. Eren had briefly gone to the bathroom, so Armin stood up to investigate the source of the voice.

It sounded like Mikasa, and Armin grew more nervous as she called his name again, more urgent. When it was called a third time, Armin had almost broken into a full sprint and found himself at Mikasa's room at the end of the hall. Why no one else was concerned, he had no idea, but he found himself at the entrance if the girl's dormitory. Hesitantly, he opened the door.

And instantly regretted it.

Mikasa must have just come from the showers, because she was clad only in a towel and dripping wet. She was standing on a chair, and looked scared out of her mind.

Mikasa? _Scared?_

Armin hand moved to his swords. Something must be horribly wrong if Mikasa is acting this way. "What is it? What happened?"

Mikasa spotted Armin and screamed, her fear turning to rage in a spit second. "Get out! Now!"

Armin flinched. "I-I-"

Something skittered across the floor, and Mikasa jumped, terrified once again. "Kill it! Kill it!"

Armin searched the ground and saw it. A huge, hideous rat was hiding in the far corner of the room.

He couldn't help but laugh.

"What the hell are you laughing about!?" Mikasa demanded, "Kill it!"

Armin took a knee and wiped his eyes, still laughing uncontrollably. "You can defeat titans with a straight face, but cower in fear over a _rat_!? That's completely out of character for you!"

"Shut up!" Mikasa shouted, her face growing red. "Just kill it!"

Armin composed himself and snuck up on the rat. He took a deep breath-

-and it attacked him.

"Gah!"Armin cried, desperately clawing at the creature, "get it off!"

Mikasa jumped from the chair and grabbed it, aiming it at Armin's head.

"Not with the _chair!"_ Armin yelled, falling to the ground. "Pull it off!"

Mikasa set down the chair and rushed to him, and began tugging on the rat with all her might, until the creature finally let go. As a result, she stumbled backwards and fell on top of Armin, throwing the rat against the opposite wall, and it turned and disappeared underneath one the beds.

She made a noise akin to a squeak, and Armin made the mistake of opening his eyes and looking at Mikasa, whose head was by his feet.

"Uh…M-M-Mikasa…"

Her legs were sprawled apart in front of him, leaving her exposed. Armin's face heated up, but for some unknown reason, completely froze up, unable to move any part of his body.

Mikasa sat up, rubbing her head. "Wha-?"

She immediately realized the compromising position they were in and screamed.

And then Cain walked in.

"Oi, what's with the-?"

He stopped, staring at the awkward position Armin and Mikasa were in.

"…what the hell?"

Armin gulped.

Cain Bismo was huge-he made _Braun_ look small-and he always had an aggressive look on his face-and a sadistic one when he smiled. He also had a large scar on his left eye, which he claims he got when he single-handedly fought a titan with nothing but a spoon.

Armin knew that Cain had some feelings for Mikasa, so he must be pissed. Heck, he'd rather have _Jean_ walk in than Cain. At least _he_ isn't as freakishly terrifying.

And then comes Eren.

"Mikasa-!"

He, like Cain, stopped completely.

"…Armin…"

Armin looked down. "…Yes Eren?"

"Why is Mikasa on top of you in only a towel?"

Mikasa stood up annoyed. "T-t-there was…a rat, and-!"

Armin's face was covered suddenly with something soft.

 _Oh no…_

Yet another scream.

Armin's view suddenly cleared as Mikasa picked up her towel and wrapped it around her.

Eren turned to Cain. "Out. Now."

Cain scoffed. "Why do _you_ get to just stay with her half naked, you pervert?! _You_ need to-!"

He was interrupted by a blow to the nose with Eren's forehead. " _Get out!_ "

"No!" Cain shouted, shoving Eren back.

Armin slowly scooted away from Mikasa. "I…I'm sorry…"

Mikasa gave him a terrifying glare, and Armin stayed put. "You got us into this mess, now get us out."

Meanwhile, Eren and Cain had gotten into a fistfight.

"I said get out!" Eren shouted, shoving Cain back.

"Why don't you?!" Cain responded with a punch.

Eren and Cain went back and forth, and Armin just laid there, cowering under Mikasa's glare.

Then he got a horrible idea.

"Hey Eren…" Armin said, laughing shakily, "what would you do if I said that Cain wants to take advantage of the fact that Mikasa is only in a towel?"

The two stopped for a moment, and Eren gave the same terrifying glare Mikasa has to Cain. "Is that true?"

"N-no!" Cain protested, "I would never-!"

"You _do_ have feelings for her, though…don't you?" Armin said, smirking.

He had a justified reason for calling him out; earlier, Cain had called out Armin's crush for Krista Lenz in front of the entire squad-including Krista herself-just yesterday. As a result, he gets teased more than ever and Krista seems to avoid him at all costs.

Armin was never one for vendetta, but he saw the opportunity and took it gladly.

"Well _yeah_ , but-"

Big mistake.

"Well you need to go," Mikasa, who had been boring holes into Armin with her stare, turned on Cain. "Before I _make_ you."

Cain rolled his eyes. "Afraid I'm going to see you naked? A bit late for _that_ , isn't it?" A chuckle escaped his mouth. "Unless you're playing hard to get-"

Eren's leg flicked out and kicked Cain in between the legs.

" _Holy-_!"

"That'll be the last time you disrespect my sister!" Eren shouted.

Cain collapsed on the ground. "…o…kay…"

Eren turned to Mikasa, concerned. "What exactly happened…?"

Mikasa didn't say anything, her face full of terror again.

Armin and Eren both looked, and the rat jumped at Eren.

"What the-?" Eren saw it skitter towards him and drop kicked it, causing it to sail out the door, hitting the wall and skittering away.

"…it really _was_ a rat…"

Armin let out a shaky laugh. "Well yeah…apparently Mikasa is deathly afraid of them…"

"Like you were deathly afraid of everyone finding out you like Krista?" Mikasa shot back emotionlessly.

Armin flinched. "I understand you're mad, but that was a low blow…"

Eren shook his head. "Hurry up and get dressed. Armin, come help me drag Cain outside."

Cain, whom was hunched in a ball of unmanly shame, spoke up. "I…can move…by myself…"

Armin stood up and pushed Cain over the threshold with his foot. "There."

"…you're really upset about that whole Lenz thing still, aren't you?" Eren asked as they stepped outside.

"Of course."

Eren sighed. "Nobody seems to be acting right today. First Mikasa and her phobia of rats-"

"Musophobia," Armin put in.

"…that, and then Cain being douchier than usual-"

"He's _always_ been like that! At least, to _me_ he has…"

"-then you knocking him down a few pegs with his crush on Mikasa."

"What's so wrong with that?"

"You…don't seem to be the type that would do that."

Armin shrugged. "I had to get him back for what he did yesterday."

"Speaking of which," Eren said, stopping and grabbing Armin's shoulder. "Isn't that Krista coming over here?"

Armin couldn't speak.

"…Armin?"

"Hi Eren! Armin!" Krista called as she approached the two, "Have you seen Mikasa? She was supposed to be training with me today."

Armin couldn't move.

Eren noticed this and nudged him. "Say something," he whispered.

"I like turtles," was Armin's immediate response.

Eren covered his face with his hand. "Mikasa is in her room getting dressed."

Krista nodded. "Thanks!" She said. After a worried glance at Armin, she walked down the hallway towards Mikasa's room.

Armin collapsed on his hands and knees, breathing heavily.

"H…how can I be so _stupid?_ " Armin shouted, beating the ground with his fist, "I hardly even know what a turtle even _is!_ "

"Hey!" Eren said, grabbing Armin's jacket and pulling him up, "stop beating yourself up! So what if you clammed up in front of your crush? Just don't do it again!"

Armin sighed as Eren let go of him. "She probably hates me, though! I mean-"

"What did I just-?"

"I know what you said," Armin shot back, "You haven't been in my situation before! This _always_ happens to me!"

"Well then you need to learn how to try-!"

"I _did_ try!" Armin shouted, head butting Eren.

And then everything went black.


	2. Armin Lieks Christa

_Armin…_

Armin didn't want to get up. He just wanted to sleep.

 _Armin…!_

"I don't wanna…" Armin mumbled back.

 _Armin!_

He finally snapped awake and found himself on the ground. "Wha-huh?"

When his vision refocused, he saw Christa's face.

"C…Christa…?"

Christa looked relieved. "You're awake!" she said gladly.

Armin felt his face heat up. "Y…yeah…"

He sat up and saw Eren to his left and Mikasa to his right. "…hi."

"Head butting Eren is always a bad idea," Mikasa stated, "because he's so hard-headed."

Eren glared daggers at her. "Am _not!_ "

"You knocked Armin unconscious. Your head is a dangerous weapon."

" _He_ hit _me_ -!"

"And look what happened."

Armin sighed and held his head. "You two…"

"Oh, I brought some ice," Christa said, grabbing a cloth filled with ice and pressing it to his forehead. "Better?"

"…yeah…"

Sad to say, but this was as close to a conversation with Christa Armin's ever had, since she'd been supposedly avoiding him. Why the sudden kindness, he didn't know. It _was_ her nature to help the weak.

"Armin, did you hear me?"

Armin's eyes snapped to Christa's. "What?"

Christa chuckled. "You're still out of it, huh?"

"Y…yeah…"

Christa stood up and held out her hand. "Here, let's take you to the infirmary to make sure you're okay to keep working."

"He's _fine_ ," Eren muttered, "you guys are overreacting."

"Actually," Armin said as he allowed Christa to pull him up, "knocking someone unconscious is a sure sign of a concussion."

Christa's eyes widened. "Oh no! Are you alright? Can you see straight? What day is it?"

Armin laughed. "I'm fine, yes I can, and it's Wednesday."

"Actually, it's Tuesday," Mikasa said, "not Wednesday."

At that, Christa grabbed Armin's hand and proceeded to pull him to the infirmary. "We need to make sure you're alright!"

Armin's face flushed, but he forced his legs to walk with her. "Christa I'm fine-!"

And suddenly, Armin tripped over thin air.

"Whoa—!" Armin cried as he fell, taking Christa down with him.

"Ow…"Christa moaned as Armin sat up on his hands and knees.

And there was Christa's face.

"…hi…" Christa whispered, her nose brushing his.

Armin's face got even redder. "H-hi…"

There was an awkward silence as the two lay there alone. Mikasa and Eren had disappeared and everyone else was still at lunch, leaving the hall from the dorms to the infirmary deserted. Here was the chance he'd been dreaming of—he accidentally trips, Christa happens to be there, they're sprawled awkwardly on the floor, they lock eyes, and then they kiss.

He never thought it would actually _happen_.

Christa's fluttered closed, and Armin made his choice, refusing to screw it up like he had a few moments ago. He leaned down—

—and was immediately drop-kicked by Cain.

"Goddammit," Cain cursed, "how come only _you_ get your happy ending? I embarrassed you in front of _everyone_ yesterday!"

"Cain—!" Christa shouted as he kicked Armin again.

"It's not my fault I have better luck with girls," Armin coughed, "Whereas Mikasa pretty much hates you—"

" _Shut up!"_ Cain shouted as he kicked him again, "It's _your_ fault! You made me look bad in front of Mikasa—!"

Armin has had enough of this. " _You_ made me look bad in front of the _entire regiment!_ You have _no_ right to say that to me! I thought Christa _hated_ me!"

Christa scrambled over to Armin and began helping him up. "Armin, about that—"

"And yet you _still_ win!" Cain interrupted, "How?!"

At that, Armin laughed out loud. "Depressing how someone like me beat you, huh?"

Cain sneered. "Don't count your chickens before they hatch," he muttered as he grabbed Armin by the shirt and brought his face to his. "You stupid punk—!"

Armin suddenly had a flashback of his childhood, where he'd be picked on by everyone else. Eren and Mikasa had to constantly protect him, day by day, because he literally had no one else to depend on.

Cain seemed to read his mind. "Your bodyguards aren't here," he growled, grinning sadistically. "So then I can—"

"Don't count your chickens…before they hatch," Armin chuckled.

Then, in one swift motion, he swung his leg forward, kicking Cain in the balls.

Cain squealed and let go of Armin, and the blonde scrambled out o reach. Meanwhile, Christa looked like she was keeping back tears.

"C-Christa—! W-what is it?" Armin asked, alarmed as he cautiously approached her.

And then she began to laugh.

"Y…you just…" Christa held her stomach and continued to giggle uncontrollably.

Now Armin was just confused. "H-huh?"

He had always thought Christa a nice girl, and never had he ever thought that she'd laugh at someone else's misery…

…but it _did_ benefit him…

Christa got a hold of herself and held out her hand to him. "Come on," she said, smiling, "now we _really_ need to get you to the infirmary."

Deciding not to question his luck, Armin grabbed her hand and smiled back. "Yeah…"

"You say that a lot when you're nervous, huh?" Christa asked as they continued their way to the infirmary, hand in hand.

Armin was about to say otherwise, but realized it was true. "Yeah…" when he realized he said it again he elaborated, "I guess it's like my go to word if I have nothing else to say."

"That and 'I like turtles.'"

Armin's face heated up. "T-t-that was _one_ time! And you had approached me after avoiding me for—!"

"I honestly thought _you_ were avoiding _me_ ," Christa admitted sheepishly, "so I figured I'd just stay out of your way."

Armin's eyebrows shot up. "…oh…well, that wasn't it at all. What made you think that?"

Christa shrugged. "I dunno," she responded, "but Ymir convinced me to talk about it with Mikasa—it was her idea to train with her, and she thought of it when she saw you and Eren walking out of her room."

Memories of the rat and the awkward situation that it caused made Armin's face heat up again.

"Why were you even in there?" Christa asked as they reached the infirmary.

"I…it's a long story," Armin replied, hesitantly scratching his head, "I'll tell you later."

Christa nodded, as if she was satisfied with that answer. "Okay then. Promise?"

Armin nodded. "Promise."

With that, they walked into the infirmary, hand in hand.

 **For those of those who either don't know or haven't noticed, Cain is indeed the same Cain from "Paradise Lost" a Canon Divergence fic I'm doing as well. Other random people from there might appear, but I'll give enough introduction so you don't have to read the other fic-but be warned, there WILL be jokes referencing it to some degree...so read it.**

 **You know what? Just read all my stories :P**

 **Views are cookies from Albertson's (freaking amazing omg) but Reviews are homemade! (They may be bad, but it's the thought that counts :D)**


	3. Armin Lieks Books

"Eren? Is that you?"

Eren was sitting in one of the beds with a nurse tending to some wounds. "Yeah. Hi."

"What happened?!" Armin asked incredulously, "we literally _just_ saw you just five minutes ago!"

"It was an accident," Eren muttered, "I accidentally ran into Jean while he was testing out another guy's 3D maneuvering device…"

"In the span of five minutes?" Christa questioned, "How is that even possible?"

"Well, he ran into me. But I kinda was in the way…"

Armin just shook his head. "You're something else, Eren. Remember that."

"Thanks, I will," Eren replied with a roll of his eyes.

Another nurse came up to the three. "Are you two just visiting, or is another one of you injured?"

Christa looked like she just remembered something. "Oh yeah! Armin might have a concussion!"

"And a broken rib or two," Armin admitted, now feeling immense pain in his abdomen.

The nurse nodded. "Let's sit you down and get you all patched up, okay?"

Armin nodded and sat down on the bed next to Eren.

"I'm going to head back, okay?" Christa said, kissing Armin on the cheek.

"Okay," Armin responded with a smile, "I'll see you later."

When Christa left, Eren began to laugh uncontrollably.

"What?" Armin asked, confused.

"It seems she shares your interest in turtles."

Armin felt his face flush. "Am I _ever_ going to live that down?"

"No," was Eren's blunt reply. "I won't let you."

Armin sighed. "I seriously need to find out what a turtle is."

* * *

"So _that's_ what a turtle is!" Armin said, his nose in his book, "I _knew_ I read of it in here!"

"It looks so cute!" Christa exclaimed, "Especially the sea ones!"

Armin decided to share with Christa his most prized possession-the book about life beyond the walls. Christa promised not to tell anyone, and he just couldn't resist the little puppy eyes she gave him when he refused.

 _"_ _Please?" Christa pleaded, "I swear on my life I won't tell anyone! Not even Ymir!"_

 _Armin looked away. "It's_ illegal. _I don't want you to get in trouble!"_

 _Christa's eyes widened and she looked like she was fending off tears. "You…don't trust me?"_

 _"_ _N-no! That's not it at all!" Armin exclaimed, shaking his head. "I just don't…"_

 _A tear fell down Christa's cheek. "…like me?"_

 _Armin almost cried himself. "No! I-I like you a lot! I…"_

 _Christa wiped her eyes and sniffed. "It's okay…I guess…"_

So that's how they ended up sitting alone on a hill overlooking a meadow, looking through Armin's book.

"It says here some turtles are so big, you can ride on them!" Armin explained in awe, "but it isn't recommended because of how slow they actually move."

"It's the same thing with the snakes with arms," Christa said, pointing at an illustrated picture of a lizard.

"Those are called _Galapagos Lizards._ They live on a far away island near a place once known as The _Galapagos Islands_."

Christa looked off into the distance. "I'd like to see that someday."

Armin sighed. "Maybe…"

"What's wrong?"

"What?"

"You looked sad," Christa said, "Does…it have to do with the islands?"

Armin shook his head. "Just…the outside world in general."

Christa laid her head on Armin's shoulder. "What happened?"

Armin contemplated telling her. About his parents-or lack thereof-and what happened.

"…Armin?"

He nodded to himself. If he can trust her with his book, then he can trust her with this.

"My…my parents tried to go outside the walls."

"Were they apart of the Scout regiment?" Christa asked, shifting to look up at him.

"No," Armin replied, "They weren't. They…they wanted to see far, far beyond the wall. Farther than any of the scout missions would ever go."

"And did they?"

Armin looked away, a subtle pain aching in his chest. "I wish I knew."

Christa sat back up. "You mean they…"

"…left me behind," Armin finished, fighting tears. "I don't know whether they died or if they found paradise. Probably both."

Christa gave him a condescending look. "I…I'm sorry…"

"For what?" Armin asked, "It's not your fault. They knew what they were getting into when they left-"

Armin felt his throat constrict, and he let out a small sob.

Christa wrapped her arms around him. "Well you have Eren, Mikasa, me-heck, the entire 104th regiment! Also, the rest of the scouts are with you! We're all family, and we won't abandon you. At least, _I_ won't. And I know Eren and Mikasa for a fact won't either."

Armin hugged her back. "Thank you."

"I'm your girlfriend. It's the least I can do."

Armin smiled to himself. He has a family.

* * *

…and a _girlfriend._

When Christa had first said it, Armin hadn't fully comprehended it. He had even went as far as to think it was just his imagination.

However, today would prove him wrong.

"Hey Armin!"

Armin had been walking from martial arts training to the kitchen with Jean when he received a tackle hug from behind.

"H-hi Christa!" Armin replied, hugging her back, "Jean and I are heading to the kitchen, you want to come?"

"Sure!" Christa said, nodding, "I'm hungry anyway."

"What…what _is_ this?"

Armin turned back to a laughing Jean. "You…you have a _girlfriend?_ I'm proud!"

"Well…" Armin didn't know how to respond. He really wanted it to be true, but he wasn't sure if it was. Plus, he didn't want to deny it, because if it was he'd hurt Christa's feelings, and he'd probably die if he saw her cry again-especially if it wasn't fake.

Christa had already replied for him. "Yes he does. Are you jealous?" She asked, laughing good-naturedly.

Jean raised an eyebrow. "No…but seriously, good job man. Who would have guessed even someone like you can find love?"

Armin's face burned. "Y-yeah…"

Jean patted his shoulder. "Don't worry, you'll get used to it. You guys will be fine." After a pause, he got a sly grin on his face. "I actually need to get…uh… _something_ from my room, so I'll meet you two there."

He didn't wait for a response as he went to the opposite direction.

Armin sighed. He seemed to be expecting something to happen, but they were just going to walk to the kitchen together.

Once again, he'd be proven wrong.

 **Fun fact-This story was the original beginning of "Paradise Lost", a fic that is under massive revision because reasons.**

 **A-anyway, my OTP was originally Armin x Christa, and Paradise Lost was originally going to be a Annie-bashing fic until I got to the actuall bashing part and decided "I actually like you...and Armin...shit." However, I couldn't edit this properly to match Annie's personality which is the polar opposite of Christa, and I still get the fluffies from reading ChristArmin so I decided to upload it.**

 **just incase you cared :D**

 **Remember, Views are Cookies from Albertson's (they always taste great like seriously) , but Reviews are Homemade! (They may burn me but it's the thought that counts :D)**


	4. Armin Lieks Cooking (But Eren Doesn't)

"Have you ever kissed anyone before?"

Armin thought about it for a moment. He hasn't, but he wondered how she'd react if he said he did-would she be mad? Upset?

"No," Armin replied, refusing to risk upsetting her. "Have you?"

Christa looked away, blushing. "Well…define _kissing_."

Armin stopped in his tracks.

"…Armin?"

What if she _had_ kissed someone else? Were they together? Why weren't they together? Did someone break her heart? Did Armin have to kill someone?

"…are you okay Armin?"

What if she's done _more_ than kissing? What if she'd gone _all the way_? What if-?

" _Armin!_ "

Armin blinked. "Huh? Sorry, lost in thought. You were saying?"

Christa twiddled her thumbs. "I never kissed anyone on the _lips_ before, but I…may or may not have kissed Reiner on the cheek once…"

"Oh," Armin said, exhaling. Well _that's_ not so bad. She _was_ kind by nature-

"-Or twice…"

Well then.

"…or twenty five times…"

Now _that_ Armin had a problem with.

"…why…?" he asked, arching an eyebrow.

Then he had a flashback to the time Christa saved his life along with Reiner's and Jean's by bringing back horses, and Reiner's comment.

 _I want to marry her._

"…did you and _Reiner_ —?!"

"I-I-It was only for a week or two while we were cadets! B-besides, he didn't _really_ like me! He broke things off and began pining after someone else."

Armin almost choked. He _willingly_ left her!? Now he _knew_ he needed to kill someone.

"…you're thinking again, aren't you?"

"W-what? O-oh…yeah…" Armin said, scratching his cheek with his forefinger, "sorry…"

"It's okay," Christa replied, smiling, "your thinking face is cute."

It felt weird to Armin to be gossiping like this—about who likes who or whatever. He's never really gotten into that kind of thing—he guessed having a girlfriend perked his interest. Before, he'd just go off alone and hide out in the library, but now he felt more… _open_.

Christa poked his face. "You're doing it again…you sure space out a lot, don't you?"

Armin decided not to comment. Instead, he opened the door to the kitchen—

—and it was completely empty.

"Huh," Armin said, cautiously stepping inside, "it's lunchtime, and even captain Levi isn't in here."

"Did something happen?" Christa asked quietly, "Because this is really weird…"

"Let's go see," Armin said, taking Christa's hand and cautiously stepped inside. When it became clear that not a soul was in the room, Armin scratched his head in bewilderment.

"Maybe they're having a meeting," Christa said, "and didn't tell us?"

Armin shrugged. "Well, let's just make some food for ourselves then."

"I like cooking," Christa agreed, "but what are we going to make?"

Another shrug. "Whatever the supplies we have let us, I guess."

After some more debate and raiding of the cabinets, they decided to just make a simple beef stew.

…which proved to be a lot more complex than they anticipated.

"Armin," Christa panted, "I can't reach the pepper…"

Armin turned from the broth he was stirring and saw her balancing precariously on her tip toes on a chair, reaching with all of her might—

"Christa—!" He cried, diving for her as she suddenly lost her footing.

There was a _thump_ as Christa landed safely on Armin's stomach.

"O-ow…" Armin moaned, "You need to be more careful…"

"I-I'm sorry," she said, giving him a look that resembled a scolded puppy.

Armin felt something tug at his heart. "I-It's okay," he murmured, "How about you stir and I season it?"

Christa looked down at him, shifting so he was straddling him. "O-okay…but be gentle about it okay? I don't want you to overdo it."

"I won't, I promise."

"What the _hell_ did I just walk into?!"

Armin turned and saw an extremely confused Eren. "Uh…we were cooking and—"

"You started having sex because _that's_ normal," Eren muttered, "seriously. In the _kitchen?_ "

Armin expected Christa to be embarrassed or abashed, but instead she was the exact opposite.

"Is someone upset that their best friend is losing their virginity before they are?" She asked, grinning deviously.

Armin's face suddenly felt like it caught fire. " _C-C-C-CHRISTA—!_ "

"You know what? I wasn't that hungry in the first place," Eren said, looking rather green. "Have fun…"

"I-It wasn't—!"

"Sure it wasn't," Eren called back, briskly walking out of the room.

When he left, Armin turned on a laughing Christa. "W-w-w-why—?!"

"Oh come on it was a joke!" she giggled, "You can't tell me the look on his face wasn't hilarious!"

Armin sighed. "I guess not…" he said, finally allowing a smile.

"Okay!" Christa said, clapping her hands, "let's get back to cooking!"


	5. Armin Lieks Picnics Without Food

"Well it seems like you have quite a bit on your plate," Christa said, attempting to massage Armin's shoulders as he hunched over a vast pile of books in the library. "Maybe you should take a break."

"Can't," Armin muttered, "I have to figure this out."

He was in the process of figuring out a strange puzzle Hanji had suggested. It was math related, where you had to put any number from 0-9 in a square, but there are so many restrictions that his mind felt like it was going to implode.

"Armin, are you even listening?"

"Mm-hmm…"

Armin sighed. He couldn't put the nine there because there's already a nine in the same column…but that was the only number he hadn't used in that box!

"You _aren't_ listening."

"Mm-hmm…"

The blonde boy furiously erased the square. He'll have to start from scratch.

But the more he looked at it, the more he realized those were the only possible answers…

 _Unless_ …Armin changed the three in the third square to a two and redid everything, succeeding in replacing the nine with the eight.

"Armin I'm pregnant."

"Finally!" Armin said as he threw the book down on the table. He had beaten the cursed game, and he felt very fulfilled.

Happiness turned to horror as he processed what she said.

Wait…they didn't even do _it_ yet! Was she cheating? Or did she do it with someone else _before_ they were dating? Was it _Reiner's_?! Or is it somehow his, like the myth of the virgin birth of Christ he read about in his book?

And when he had yelled _finally_ , it sounded as if it was _planned_! What if someone else heard that!? He knew that he was going to be called into Erwin's office for a stern talking to, that's for sure…

"By your facial expression I can tell you're overreacting," Christa said, patting his shoulder, "I was _kidding_."

"…oh…" Armin let out a breath he didn't know he was holding.

"Yeah, you _definitely_ need a break," Christa said, laughing. "You're going to fry that brain of yours, and we still need it."

"Yeah…" Armin said, scratching his head, "what did you have in mind?"

"Well…" Christa tapped her chin and made an exaggerated 'hmm…' "How about a date?"

Armin's eyebrows shot up. "A…a what?"

Christa shrugged. "We've been dating for a day and a half, so we might as well…"

"Oh…okay then, where do you want to go?"

"Wait…you actually agreed?"

"Yeah, why not?" Armin asked, "I still owe you a first date, right?"

Christa's face lit up like a Christmas tree. "Really? Thank you!" She said as she began to repeatedly kiss Armin's cheek.

"I'm your boyfriend. It's the least I can do."

.

"How do you feel about picnics?"

Christa looked up at him, confused. "I, uh…I don't mind them…but why? We just had dinner"

Suddenly, Armin picked her up bridal style.

"W-wha—? Armin what are you—!?"

"I'm taking you out on that date I promised!" Armin said happily as he carried her outside.

Christa raised an eyebrow at him, then shrugged. "O-Okay then…but for a picnic, don't you need food?"

"We just had dinner," Armin reminded her, "but I'll keep the picnic idea for future reference."

Smiling, Christa nodded. "Okay! So…where are you taking me?"

"A special place of mine," he replied vaguely. "It was a surprise, and I don't want to ruin it."

"It isn't your pants, is it? Because Cain tried that pickup line with me before and it was creepy."

Armin stopped and looked at her. "He _what?_ "

"It was poorly executed too. The idiot kept stuttering the entire time."

That wasn't what he was worried about. "Um…no…it's _not_ my pants…it's an actual location."

"Just making sure."

"Here we are!"

It was a small area behind the cottage with a koi pond and a wide variety of flowers growing around it. It had darkened by the time they arrived, but the light from the base and the full moon was sufficient enough for Armin to navigate his way to the edge of the pond and set Christa down beside it.

"It's…it's so pretty," she said, looking around in awe. "And you can see a lot of stars too!"

Armin smiled and settled down next to her, casually draping his arm around her waist and pulling her close. "I figured you'd like it."

Christa leaned into him and laid her head on his chest. "I do. It's so…peaceful."

They sat there for a while, craning their necks up at the night sky, pointing out constellations and the occasional butterfly or moth that would cross their path.

Then suddenly, Christa pushed Armin down to the ground.

"H-hey!" Armin said, laughing as Christa straddled him, "What are you—?"

He was interrupted by her lips. "Don't talk," she said, "and don't think either."

Deciding to follow her advice, he pulled her into him and kissed her deeply.

Without thinking, he flipped them over and began to leave a trail of kisses down her neck, murmuring her name. She responded with a moan, and Armin's stomach filled with butterflies.

Starting to feel a little bold, he began to unbutton her shirt while she unbuttoned his, their lips returning to each other. Armin threw his shirt somewhere to the left of him, moaning when Christa ran a hand down his spine.

"Armin…" she whispered.

He had successfully unbuttoned her shirt and began to take it off. "Christa…"

"We…should stop…" she said. However, she continued to run her fingers though his hair, down his back, and he couldn't think properly for the life of him.

"That doesn't mean we're going to," he replied back, smiling into the crook of her neck.

"G…good…" she moaned, and he leaned up and kissed her on the lips. He then began to kiss her neck, her collarbone, her—

" _Oi!_ Armin!"

The boy leaped about five feet in the air. "S-shoot! U-uh…"

Christa put a hand on her face. "Are you _serious_?"

Armin hastily buttoned up Christa's shirt and got off her right when Cain rounded the corner, panting. " _There_ you are!"

Startled, Armin clumsily fell off of Christa and onto the stony shore of the pond. He felt something stab him and he cried out in pain.

Christa looked at him, eyes wide. "Did you just—?!"

"Yep," he muttered, "I just did…"

"Man you'll never believe—what happened to _you_ runt?"

Sighing, Armin tossed the rock he fell on out of sight. "I fell on one of the rocks. Christa was just looking to see if it was bad, but I'm going to the infirmary."

"Where?" he asked, "I don't see any— _oh_ …"

Armin looked down at the cut. It wasn't big, but it was deep and bleeding profusely. He looked away and hissed in pain.

"Just wait," Cain said, "I had just—"

"I'm not in the mood for your mindless gossip," Armin muttered, standing up and wincing as his injury stung. "I need to get medical attention before I pass out from blood loss."

"Oh come on it'll only take a second! So anyway, Mikasa—"

Christa stood up and put a hand on Armin's shoulder. "C'mon, or else it'll get infected."

Cain made a face. "Who are you, his mom? Screw off."

Christa flinched and withdrew her hand. "I'm concerned for his _health_ —"

"-Like an overprotective mom," Cain retorted, "His mom's _dead_ , isn't she? Just go away and play with your lesbian friend you're always with or something."

Armin felt his patience die instantly—he would have smacked him right then if he had the energy. Instead, he settled with a menacing glare. "You're right, I don't want her here. I want her in the infirmary, next to my bed while I'm getting stitches. Now, if you'll excuse us—"

"I'll take you so you can listen to me talk," Cain persisted, waving away Christa. "Now shoo. No one wants you here."

Christa looked down, but then looked back up, defiant. "No."

Cain rolled his eyes. "You're so damn _annoying—_!"

Then, without warning, he shoved Christa backwards, making her fall into the pond with a cry.

"Much be—"

Before, he would have just run over to Christa and helped her up, and Cain probably would have smirked and swaggered off. He refused to allow that.

So instead, he hit him.

It wasn't a slap either—it was a full uppercut to the jaw. It made a small crack, and Cain stumbled back.

"You can antagonize _me_ all you want, but don't you dare lay a finger on Christa."

He flinched but waved a dismissive hand. "Whatever. I don't wanna talk to you anyway."

Ignoring the pain in his side and the pride of finally standing up to Cain, Armin took a deep breath and turned to Christa, who had climbed out of the water soaking wet. Picking up his discarded shirt, he walked over to her and began to unbutton her shirt.

"Not now," she muttered, "I'm in a bad mood, you're injured, and Cain is still over there."

"It's not sexual," he stated bluntly, "I'm giving you my dry shirt to put on."

Nodding, she took of her soaked shirt and held out her hand for his. "Thank…you…?"

Armin froze completely. Earlier when they were kissing, he hadn't gotten a good look at her breasts. However, with only a bra on-

Stopping that train of thought right there, he handed her the shirt. "Sorry," he said, laughing nervously and scratching his cheek with his forefinger. "It's just…"

Christa laughed. "I'm shirtless and you're shirtless?"

"…Yeah… _that…_ "

They leaned in, but Christa thought better of it and stood up. She must have seen his disappointment, because she rolled her eyes. "Armin, you're still _injured_. We can roll around later when you're physically able."

Armin laughed-but winced again when he stood. "Y-yeah…"

Christa smiled. "Yeah."


	6. Eren Lieks Making Fun of Armin

"What the hell happened to _you_?"

Armin sighed. "Nothing Eren, I'm fine. I'm getting stitches because they'll make me look cool."

Laughing, Eren sat down next to him. "Ha ha, very funny. But seriously, what's with the stitches? Do I need to beat up someone?"

"Already did."

Eren raised an eyebrow. "Really?"

Armin laughed and shook his head. "No, of course not…though I might have fractured his jaw."

"Y…you might have _what?_ " Eren asked, appalled. "I don't believe you. Who'd you hit? _Natalie_? That wouldn't come as a surprise."

"No, not her, though I'd _like_ to break her jaw."

"Let's see…Ymir?"

Armin made a face. "Why would I do that? She'd probably kill me, and Christa would be upset."

Eren rolled his eyes. "Yeah yeah…how about…I don't know, Jean?"

"Nope."

"Give me a hint, since I have no basis in these guesses. Boy or girl?"

"Boy."

"Bigger or smaller."

It was Armin's turn to roll his eyes. "Name _one_ male that's smaller than me. Honestly, they would be a _dwarf_."

"Connie is _._ Uh…dark hair?"

Armin didn't comment on Connie's stature. "Yeah."

"Is he big?"

"Huge."

Eren looked unconvinced. "It's not Bertoldt, is it?"

Armin shook his head. "No, bigger."

"Erwin?!"

"Yes, I punched the _blonde_ Commander in the face," Armin said, "c'mon Eren I know you're not _that_ stupid-even _Cain_ wouldn't do that!"

"Okay okay _fine_. How about… _Cain_?"

Armin just grinned.

"…no," Eren said.

He didn't respond.

"…I don't believe you."

A laugh.

"Y…you…sweet Wall Maria Armin I can't _believe_ you! Damn! How did you even-?!"

"It was a swift uppercut," he replied, "and he actually backed off."

Eren whistled. "I'm proud of you," he said, patting Armin's back, "Seriously."

"Yeah…" Armin said, smiling, "Now Christa and I can hang out in peace without that guy busting in out of nowhere and-"

"Wait you were with Christa when it happened?"

Armin blushed and looked away. "I-yeah…"

"Well well…what were you two up to?" Eren asked, smirking. "Probably cuddling or something."

 _We can roll around again when you're physically able_.

"Uh…not quite… _cuddling…_ " The blonde replied, scratching his head.

"All done," the nurse said, "you should lie down though-you don't want the stitches to rip open, do you?"

Armin shook his head. "No ma'am."

The nurse smiled. "Well in that case, stay the night. You probably shouldn't work for about a week or so to let yourself heal."

"Are you serious?" Armin asked, sighing. "I had _just_ gotten clearance to work _today,_ and I'm bedridden for the next week _again_."

Eren gave him a look.

"…what?"

"…I just realized how disheveled you look."

Armin gave him a confused look. "Huh?"

Eren pointed to his blonde hair. "It's messy as hell-it has grass and stuff in it. No matter what, your hair is _always_ neat, when you first wake up, after training, even when you fall off a horse or a _building_ or something."

"My hair got messy when we unleashed the female titan in wall Sina," Armin said matter-of-factly.

"The fact that you remember that attributes to how little it gets messed up. I highly doubt that you were rolling around with _Annie_ , so-"

He stopped, and Armin turned away.

"…no."

His face got redder.

"… _no_."

No response.

"You…and Christa were…" Eren began to laugh insanely. "Did you show her your-?"

"Oh my god Eren that's _disgusting!_ " Armin complained, pushing him away. "No, she did _not_ see my penis!"

"Don't _yell_ that!" Eren said, shushing him. "Geez…but did you see her boobs?"

Armin rolled his eyes. He has a problem with the _male_ reproductive organ, but when it comes to women he's very flamboyant. "Not really."

Eren gave him a sly grin. "What do you mean 'not _really_ '?"

"Uh…well…" The blonde began to feel uncomfortable. He didn't think Christa would be too fond of him bragging about touching her like that.

"C'mon, I won't tell a soul," Eren promised, "I'm your best friend, remember?"

That _was_ true-they've told each other everything. There were no secrets between them at all.

Feeling more at ease, Armin relented. "Well…Cain pushed her into the pond and I had her take off her shirt so she could put my dry one on, and she had a bra on underneath."

"Aw," Eren moaned, "if she was shirtless-"

"-Cain would have seen them too, so I'm rather happy about that."

Eren nodded. " _That_ would be bad," he agreed, "so okay. But what were you doing _before_ he showed up?"

Armin blushed. "We…well…we just _kissed_ …"

"…kiss as in 'smooch' kiss? Or was it kiss as in 'rolling all over the place, tearing each other's clothes off and eating each other alive' kiss?"

They heard the door slam open, and Armin was momentarily afraid. Was it Cain coming to get him while he's unable to fight back?

Luckily, it wasn't. It was actually Ymir, with Christa following behind.

"Hey guys," Eren said. He looked like he was holding back laughter. "We're just…talking."

Ymir had a completely straight face. "Were you pressuring poor Armin about how their little date went? Because I was going to ask the same thing."

Christa tugged on Ymir's sleeve, and she looked… _embarrassed_. "Ymir, I was being _sarcastic_! We didn't _really-_!"

"Then what's with _this_?" Ymir demanded, taking Christa's head and cocking it to the side revealing a small bruise.

Armin tensed. Did…did _he_ do that?!

"Sweet Rose Armin you gave her a _hickey_!?" Eren said, laughing. "You ' _just kissed_ ' huh?! I _so_ don't believe you anymore!"

Christa swatted away Ymir's hand. "I-I fell into the pond, remember? I even had the wet clothes to prove it!"

"What did his 'titan' look like?" Ymir asked, putting her hand around Christa's shoulders and grinning.

"His…what…?"

"She's talking about Armin's penis," Eren said bluntly.

Armin turned to him, horrified. "You don't just _say_ that Eren! At least Ymir had the decency to be _discreet_ about it!"

"But you just-"

"There weren't two _girls_ in the room when I said that," Armin huffed.

"Said _what_?" Ymir demanded.

Christa shook her head frantically. "I-I didn't see it yet! I swear!"

" _Yet?_ " Eren and Ymir asked at the same time.

If her face was red before, it was completely crimson now. "W-well, I-I-!"

"You're expecting it to awaken in all its majesty soon, huh?" Ymir asked, laughing.

"What class are you expecting it to be?" Eren asked, laughing as well.

"Watch it be an abnormal variant," Ymir teased, "and only a five meter cla- _oof!_ "

Without warning, Christa head-butted Ymir in the ribs.

"That's _too much_ Ymir!" Christa cried, "You're being _mean_! Say you're sorry!"

"Ow geez! Okay okay I'm sorry!" She said, wincing in pain.

Armin didn't quite know what to say to that.

" _Anyway_ ," Christa said, "how are you doing? Are you alright?"

"No," Armin admitted, "I have to say bedridden for another week or so."

"Lazy," Ymir muttered.

Christa head-butted her again.

"Okay I'll just _leave_! Ow…"

When Ymir left, Christa smiled. "I'll leave you and Eren to your…'man talk.'"

With that, she left.

"So…you gave her a _hickey_ -"

"She jumped me," Armin muttered, " _and_ she started undressing me first."

" _Undressing_?! Oh my-you were bottom or top?"

Armin rubbed the back of his neck. "Bottom at first, then top…"

"Was she soft?"

"Not telling."

Eren made a face. " _Well_ then. Was she-?"

" _Bye_ Eren."

Eren blinked. "I wasn't-"

Armin gave him a pointed look, and he finally understood. "Right…sorry…"

He got up and winked at his friend. Armin laughed. "You're ridiculous."

"You're lucky," Eren retorted as he left.


	7. Armin Doesn't Liek Cain

"Hey _Christa_ ," Cain said, coming up behind her and Ymir. "What's up?"

Christa sighed and set down her spoon. " _What_ Cain?"

Cain slid into the seat next to her, grinning. "I think you should dump Armin and come with me."

"After you pushed me into a pool and said no one wanted me and throwing Armin's parents' deaths in his face? Not interested."

"What's he got that I don't?" Cain persisted, "he's a _wimp_."

"He's got _brains_. You're the dumbest human being I've _ever_ had the misfortune of meeting."

Ymir looked on in surprise. "I didn't know you could be so _mean_ Christie," she said, "I mean, _ouch_!"

"He talks a lot for someone whose jaw is fractured."

"Hey," Cain protested, "'fractured' is not 'broken'!"

Ymir and Christa exchanged confused looks, but neither said anything.

Armin walked by to put his tray away. "Cain, are you _seriously_ trying to flirt with my girlfriend again?"

"Hey _shut up_ runt! I do what I _want_!" he replied, giving Armin a smirk. "You got lucky last night. I'm not letting it happen again."

With that, he turned around and pulled Christa close to him. "So, what do you say, girl?"

"You know this is sexual harassment, right?" Christa muttered.

The boy rolled his eyes. He was even weaker than usual, so the chances of surviving a fight with Cain were in the negatives for today…

"Besides…" Cain's voice lowered to a whisper. "…why would you hang out with a filthy Maria refugee like him?"

Armin froze in his tracks.

"W-What!?" Christa cried, "I-that doesn't matter! Besides, he's _not_ —"

"Oh yes he is," Cain replied, turning to Armin. "How long did you have to live in a _garbage_ _dump_ before you enlisted to get yourself _killed_? I bet old gramps would be turning in his grave to see you die like _he_ did."

 _Now_ he's gone too far.

People who happened to be in earshot started whispering and glancing—some even had the nerve to _glare_ like it was _his_ fault—and Armin's patience reached its limit. Noticing an empty chair at the table right behind them, he took took it and quietly snuck up behind Cain.

"Honestly," he continued, "the kid's _pathetic_!"

Christa turned away from him. "H-how can you say something so—so _cruel_!?"

"The truth hurts," the brunette retorted.

Then, in one fluid motion, Armin swung the chair over his head and slammed it on Cain's head, making it splinter and fall apart.

All sound in the room ceased.

Cain sat there for a moment, completely frozen, and Armin became more and more worried. If the blow wasn't hard enough—

"Is…is he okay…?" Christa asked, poking Cain's cheek.

Cain blinked. "O…ow…"

He slowly turned around, and Armin feared for his life. However, he couldn't bring himself to run away. Cain rose to his full height, and he he forced himself to not show fear as he looked him dead in the eye.

"Did you do that?"

The entire room was completely quiet.

" _Well_?"

 _I've made a_ horrible _mistake._ "Yeah. And?"

He saw Cain's arm tense, and Armin ducked away from the hook. Without thinking, he launched his head upwards, hitting Cain in the jaw. Since it was already injured, it made him cry out in pain and fall backwards into the table.

But then he pitched forward and tackled him.

"You _really_ think that was a good idea runt?!" Cain asked, raising a fist into the air. "I guess you're not so smart after all, huh?"

He went to throw the punch, and Armin grabbed his arm and pushed it past his face, so it hit the ground next to him. Then, while Cain was still stunned, he grabbed Cain's arm wrapped his legs around his neck. Then he squeezed as hard as he could, making Cain gasp for air.

"Y-you…stupid…augh…" Cain huffed. His other arm was trapped at his side, so he couldn't pull any punches.

Suddenly Cain freed his other hand and threw a solid punch at his nose. He cried in pain and let go, and Cain threw another one.

 _Wimp!_

When he saw Eren and Mikasa get up simultaneously to come to his rescue, something snapped inside him. He _refused_ to let them coddle him again.

 _I'm_ not _weak._

Grabbing a leg from the destroyed chair, he hit Cain in the face with it, making him cry in pain. Using this as a distraction, he used all of his strength to flip them over so he'd be on top.

He distantly heard someone call his name, but he ignored it. Instead, he grabbed him by the collar and began to rain down punches to his face like Cain had done to him.

"I'll…kill…you…runt…" Cain gasped.

"Not if I…kill you first…" Armin replied, not stopping once.

Then suddenly Armin felt a sharp pain in his side and cried out in pain. He looked and saw that Cain had dug his fingers into his recently-acquired stitches and tore them open.

Focused on hitting him out and the horrible pain in his side, he didn't see that Cain grabbed another leg from the destroyed chair until he drove it into his right shoulder. Armin screamed in pain and Cain drove it in further. In retaliation, the blonde moved his knee to the brunette's sternum and placed all of his weight on it, rendering him unable to breathe.

Cain struggled to catch his breath and push him off, but Armin continued to mercilessly punch him with his uninjured left—and strongest—arm. Not once did he stop—not when he felt his knuckles bruise, when blood sprayed from his now broken nose onto Armin's shirt and face, not even when Christa screamed his name.

Suddenly he felt himself be ripped away from Cain.

"What the _fuck_ man!?" Eren shouted as he restrained him. Armin felt himself resist, but stopped when he saw the horrified expressions of everyone else.

Blinking he stared at Cain's unmoving body on the floor. Someone had a first aid kit with them and tending to his wounds, and Christa was nowhere to be found.

Noticing that his best friend wasn't resisting anymore, Eren let go and turned on him. "What the hell was that?" he demanded, "You're not like this! What the fuck happened!?"

Armin opened his mouth to explain but Mikasa interrupted. "He'll tell us later," she said, "Right now we need to get him to the hospital again."

 _Again._

Suddenly, Armin became irritated at the kind gesture. "I'm fine," he said dully, shaking off Eren's lingering hand on his shoulder. His entire body was screaming in pain, but he ignored it as he sighed and began to walk to the infirmary.

Eren followed and took his arm. "Here, I'll carry—"

"I said I'm _fine_ ," he snapped.

Eren flinched back. "You're too weak to make it to the infirmary on your own. Let Mikasa and I help—!"

 _Too weak_.

Armin shook his head but said nothing. He was going to either start screaming or crying, and he didn't want to have another episode in front of everyone.

"Damn it Armin you're going to die before you make it there," Eren exploded, "now come on!"

"I said I'm _fine_!" Armin snapped back.

Right as he said that, his head swam as black spots appeared in the corners of his eyes.

"You're losing too much blood," Eren muttered, "I'm carrying you whether you like it or not!"

"I…" before he could fight back, he lost consciousness.


	8. Eren and Mikasa Don't Liek Angry Armin

"…see, this is why we shouldn't leave his side!"

Armin slowly opened his eyes upon the Eren's shouting. His vision was still a bit blurry as he stirred a bit, but he didn't want to take the energy to sit upright.

"Oi, Armin!" Eren shouted as the bed dipped, making Armin roll slightly. When he did, he let out a muffled groan as pain lanced through his body.

"Eren," Mikasa chastised, "Stop being so loud and get off the bed, you're hurting him."

The brunette did as he was told with a mumble.

"So you're awake," the nurse said, "that's good. I was afraid you were going to slip into a coma…"

"Can we speak to him privately?" Mikasa asked politely, "Please?"

The nurse nodded. "Of course," she replied, "he's already patched up; just don't jostle him too much. I'll be back in about twenty minutes to check up on him.

With that she left, and Mikasa's gaze fell on him. "Armin," she stated.

"What the hell happened!?" Eren exploded, "You—you've _never_ acted like that before!"

Armin sat up slowly, every muscle in his body screaming at him to stop. "How long was I asleep?"

Eren opened his mouth t to answer, but Mikasa cut him off. "A day and a half. Cain is still unconscious."

When he heard that he cast his eyes to the floor. "…oh."

"' _Oh_ '?" Eren asked, "Armin, almost killed someone and all you've got to say is ' _oh'_? You _have_ to tell us what happened. Something _really_ bad had to have happened for you to bash him over the head with a _chair_ …"

"Eren," Mikasa chastised again, but Armin cut her off.

"He insulted my grandfather."

There was a long pause, and Eren's face slowly contorted in rage. "… _what_?"

Armin sighed. If it was the other way around (which it usually was) then he was sure this scene would play out in almost the exact same way. "He said that…that he'd be turning in his grave to see me die like he did, trying to fight the titans."

The chair Eren had sat down scooted back as he shot up. "That son of a _bitch_!" he shouted, taking the chair and lifting it to toss.

Luckily, Mikasa took it and set it back down. "Calm down Eren," she said, "Armin took care of it, remember."

She then turned to Armin. "Cain currently has a concussion, a broken nose and jaw, three broken ribs and possibly a punctured lung. He'll live, but he might not wake up ever again."

Armin averted his gaze. _He did all of_ that _?_ "…oh."

For some reason, he just could _not_ bring himself to care. He tormented him for _months_ , and the only logical explanation for his extreme reaction was the fact that he did it so long that when he went too far he just… _snapped_.

"Damn him to hell," he muttered, clenching his fists. "He deserved every cut and bruise I gave him."

Eren stared at him like he was crazy, and Mikasa blinked in surprise. Hell, even _he_ was surprised at himself—he was usually level-headed and rational, the calm one of the three. Eren was the reckless one, and Mikasa would go anywhere Eren would go, making her just as reckless—if in a different way.

"Armin," Mikasa said gently, "it's in the past. The damage is done, so you should move on."

It took him a second to realize what he was hearing. It's usually _him_ who tells either of them to calm down and move on, and it feels weird to for him to be on the receiving end—it was almost _belittling_ to him.

 _This must be why Eren gets even angrier whenever I try to calm him down,_ Armin thought as he sighed.

"Sorry," he apologized, "The pain's just making me cranky. Just ignore me."

"No it's not," Eren growled, "You're right. The next time I see him—"

"—He'll still be in a hospital bed," Mikasa finished, "You won't do anything to someone who can't fight back."

Eren sighed, knowing she was right. "Yeah, yeah…" he muttered, "that doesn't mean he doesn't piss me off."

The door opened, and a blonde head peeked inside. "A…Armin?"

"C-Christa?" Armin asked, eye wide.

"Let's go Eren," Mikasa said as she dragged a kicking and screaming Eren out of the room.


End file.
